Are there times in your relationship where you think, "It wasn't supposed to be like this?"
For most couples, their blissful wedding day was filled with anticipation of a connected and fulfilling life together. When they vowed "for better or worse," they assumed they could handle whatever came their way because they would do it together.
They certainly didn't expect to feel distant, disconnected, and alone.
The truth is, marriage is hard. For everyone.
Even couples who deeply love each other struggle to feel important, understood, and validated.
The challenge of communicating vulnerable feelings often leads to misunderstandings, hurt, and distress.
And when your relationship is strained, everything feels more difficult.
At times, it may even feel so desperate that divorce seems like the only option.
Do you know the number one reason for divorce? Some people think it's sex or finances, but it's not.
The Four Securities That Make All The Difference
What if you could learn from an expert in couples' relationships?
Meet Dr. Kim Blackham. Kim is a leading expert in successful marriages. As a popular speaker, blogger, and marriage therapist, she has helped thousands of couples all over the world.
Kim is among a small, elite group of therapists recognized as experts in emotionally focused therapy. She has spent years training with leading international EFT experts including Dr. Sue Johnson, the founder of emotionally focused therapy. She now helps train other therapists who are learning the model.
Kim specializes in working with couples in crisis, couples struggling to overcome an affair or other serious emotional injury, and couples seeking a deep emotional connection. She also specialize in working with physician couples who are struggling to balance the demands of work and family life.
It is important to note that Kim is specifically trained as a couples' therapist. She was not trained as an individual therapist who happens to see some couples. Her bachelors, masters, and doctoral degrees have all been in marriage therapy, and 100% of her therapy practice is with couples.
Introducing
The Anatomy of Connection
The online relationship workshop
for married, engaged, and seriously committed couples.
A step-by-step, proven path to help you create a deeply fulfilling, resilient relationship.
Here's What You Get with The Anatomy of Connection Online Workshop:
YOU GET
- 21 Sessions with almost 9 hours of content
- Access for 1 year, so you can come back and review again and again
- A bonus workbook full of exercises and action plans to help you begin to connect on a deeper level
- Access to free online assessments (including scoring and interpretation) to help you understand yourself and your relationship
- A 30-day money back guarantee so there's absolutely no risk to you
Module 1 - Introduction: Attachment
- The 2 truths about secure relationships
- The #1 predictor of divorce
- The 4 factors that matter most in your relationship (So you know where to focus your energy)
- The real reason for distress in marriages
Module 2 - Tracking Tendencies
- The 2 things you and your partner do that keep your relationship stuck
- The role of emotions and how to make sense of them
- The secret for understanding your partner and his or her behavior
- The 5 questions to answer to help you identify the negative patterns in your relationship
- The 5 strategies to keep you out of those negative patterns so you can create new, connecting ways of interacting with each other
Module 3 - Healing Hurts
- What hurt is and why it impacts us the way it does
- The difference between sympathy and empathy
- The reason some hurts are not easily forgotten
- The 3 crucial components of empathy
- The 3 important elements of a successful apology
- 3 messages to share with your partner when you are working to forgive
- The #1 thing to do when your partner is hurting
- The difference between shame and guilt
- 5 ways to develop greater self-compassion
Module 4 - Restructuring Responses
- The importance of loyalty
- Safeguards to affair-proof your marriage
- The key to seeing your partner through different eyes
- The core principles for staying out of your negative cycle
- What to do when things go wrong
- 3 ways to improve loyalty and trust
Module 5 - Improving Intimacy
- How to feel physically and emotionally connected during sex
- How to increase sexual desire
- How to create a more fulfilling and fun sex life
- How to feel more comfortable talking about sex
- Why sex is important in your relationship
- 3 different sexual attachment styles
- 6 characteristics of couples who have have great sex
- 3 elements to help you become more erotically intelligent
- The benefits of orgasm
- Most important thing to do after sex
Module 6 - Valuing Vulnerability
- The five steps to ask for what you want and need in a way that invites your partner to be close
- How to move past the superficial and develop deeply connecting conversations
- The importance of vulnerability in relationships
- 4 practices to help you tune into your emotions (even if you are not an emotional person).
- 5 steps to deep and connecting conversations
- 3 behaviors your partner needs from you to feel understood and validated
Module 7 - Enhancing Endurance
- How to avoid living parallel lives
- The key moments throughout the day that are essential to come together
- 3 ways to become more emotionally generous
- 5 ways to create intentional, successful relationships
- The 7 hours a week that can literally save your marriage
This Program is Based on the Best Research in the Field of Marriage Therapy.
This program is based on the principles of Emotionally Focused Therapy (EFT). EFT is a research based approach to treating couple distress. Clinically, it has a 70-75% success rate at moving couples from high distress to a secure connection and a 90% improvement rate!
While this program is not therapy, the purpose of this workshop is to give you an experience of EFT. One of the reasons EFT is so effective is because it is more than you learning new ideas or skills. The goal of EFT is to give you new bonding experiences that fundamentally change the way you interact and relate with each other.
The exercises in this program are designed to give you those connecting experiences and help you better understand yourself and your partner.
When you are securely connected, it is easier to let go of resentment, rebuild trust, move on from the past and embrace a hopeful future together.
Join Now and Get 3 FREE Bonuses Worth $130!
BONUS #1: The Anatomy of Connection Workbook
- Over 100 pages of exercises, tips, tricks, and ideas to improve your relationship
- Specific exercises for each module to help you apply what you are learning
- Diagrams, charts, and checklists to help you make sense of how and why you get stuck
- Introspection questions and exercises to decode your own emotional experience
BONUS #2: Individual and Relationship Assessments
- Get insight into your yourself and your relationship
- Determine if you are on track to have the relationship you desire
- Make sense of why you do some of the things you do
BONUS #3: Getting Started Module
- Course completion secrets to get you successfully through the program
- Supplemental video explaining how this can work for you--even if you or your partner are not naturally open with emotions and experiences
This Course is Designed with Your Busy Lives in Mind.
A SMALL TIME COMMITMENT EACH WEEK CAN BRING SIGNIFICANT RESULTS!
CONSIDER THE POSSIBILITIES FOR THE ULTIMATE CONVENIENCE:
15-30 MINUTES A DAY
Watch one video lesson each night and you'll be finished in three weeks.
~ AN HOUR A DAY
Watch one full module a night and you'll be finished in one week.
WEEKEND MORNINGS
Watch one lesson every Saturday and Sunday morning and you'll be finished in less than two months.
DATE NIGHT
Watch one module for date night each week and you'll have something to talk about over dinner.
Plan Your Own Marriage Retreat When It Fits With Your Schedule.
A great way to complete the course is in a Do-It-Yourself Marriage Retreat format. No more missing out on a marriage retreat because the dates aren't convenient for you. When you purchase today, you have access to the course for a full year! Plan the ultimate marriage enrichment getaway for whenever works best for you!
WEEKEND RETREAT
Rent a mountain cabin or a beach house for the weekend and work through the whole course.
SECOND HONEYMOON
Pick a destination off your bucket list, and spend a week going through one module each day.
ANNIVERSARY CRUISE
Take a 7-night cruise and work through one module each day. You'll come back with a great tan and a stronger relationship!
STAYCATION
You don't have to go anywhere fancy to experience a retreat. Use your vacation week at home to work through one module each day.
And the Best Part Is: You Can Come Back and Watch or Listen to Certain Lessons or Modules if You Need a Refresher--Wherever and Whenever.
WHILE YOU WORKOUT
WHEN THE KIDS ARE AT SCHOOL
DURING YOUR COMMUTE
Two things to consider before reading how this program has benefited other couples
Now You Get Access to Research Proven Principles that Have Helped Thousands of Couples Just Like You Learn to THRIVE™
"Over the years, our connection has not always been where we wanted it to be. One of us would sometimes say to the other, 'You seem a little distant' or 'I don’t feel as close to you as I want to.' After viewing these videos, we were able to recognize what caused some of that distance. But more than that, we were able to fix it. Over the past few weeks, we have used the skills learned from these videos on many occasions. We are communicating on a deeper level and will forever be grateful for the incredible insights we learned from Dr. Blackham. These videos are a must for any marriage! Our great marriage is now even better."
"Our marriage has struggled for years. When I found Dr. Blackham’s program, I was desperate for help. I knew mentioning physical marriage counseling wasn’t the right thing for us at the time. I began viewing these videos by myself and was surprised by how emotional I became. 'Yes! That is how I feel!' Not only did I feel validated, I was given skills on how to help myself. After a few weeks of using what I learned from these modules, my husband commented on the changes he had seen and felt and asked what had changed. We then went back and together watched the videos and worked on the workbook side by side. I didn’t think our marriage could grow as much as it did with this format. This worked for us--at home, in our pajamas rather than in a doctor’s office feeling uncomfortable. I am telling everyone about The Anatomy of Connection and the miracle this program has been for our marriage. Order them now! You won’t regret it!"
“The workshop is a great way to deepen and strengthen your relationship. If you have recurring disagreements or are stuck in certain areas, it provides a terrific framework for understanding and talking about those.”
"I have been to multiple marriage therapists throughout the years hoping to get help to fix our relationship and be happy. I never received the kind of information I got from Kim in her videos. I did not understand how the harder I tried to get the love and attention I needed, the further we grew apart. But I understand it now.
The information in this program is invaluable. It just makes sense. I had that “ah ha” moment right away and couldn’t wait to get to the next video. Now I know why we were always getting stuck and unable to move forward. Using specific examples, Kim identifies the behavior that causes the disconnection and then shares ways to fix it.
I recommend this program to anyone who is searching for help to get the relationship they have always wanted. This is real and it works."
“This workshop is an essential guide to taking your relationship to a much deeper level. This will help you see things in yourself and your partner that you were never aware of and will enhance your life tremendously.”
"When we first started the program (or rather I first started the program), I was so scared that we were too far gone. We had crossed the line with how we spoke to each other, and I thought our patterns were established and unfixable. We both listened to the program, worked in the workbook and had some very difficult conversations. It has not been easy, but our relationship has been better than it ever has been. We are in our intern year, as hard as it has been work wise, we have been better with our communication and recognizing what negative patterns we fall into, if we're not careful. I am so grateful for the opportunity The Anatomy of Connection gave our marriage to grow, in spite of such crazy work schedules and busy lives. Thank you Kim!"
"We have LOVED your course! It is very well done! We have learned so much from each session and it has allowed us to talk through some of our struggles. Your videos are easy to watch and follow and they are full of practical ways to assess one's marriage and help improve it. I feel like we are making baby steps in our marriage with this program. I'm thankful to have the workbook so we can keep working through the material. Thanks for the work you do. Thanks for the time and energy you put into providing these resources to help other marriages grow and thrive."
You have likely thought a lot about how to strengthen your relationship.
So what will be different tomorrow?
For most people, the answer is nothing.
The dream of a fulfilling, connected relationship will remain just that. A dream.
For many, it’s easier to believe “It’ll never happen,” or “It’ll get better when...,” or “Things really aren’t that bad,” or “Someday we'll work on us.”
The only way to achieve different results is to begin by believing change is possible now--and it's easier than most people think.
You need to arm yourself with a proven process that works--a proven process for healing distress and creating a secure, fulfilling relationship.
The Anatomy of Connection is the process that does just that.
Is This Program Right For You?
There are times in your relationship when you feel disconnected and don't know how to fix it.
When was the last time you saw this play out in your relationship? Things were going fine and then something happened that triggered the disconnect. It only took a second before both of you felt hurt and misunderstood. But the more you tried to talk about and resolve it, the worse it got.
Or do you have “hot topics” you try to avoid because they feel like unresolvable issues? Parenting, in-laws, sex, finances? Every time you bring them up you get stuck?
This program will teach you how to communicate more effectively.
Instead of feeling hurt and angry, you will feel understood, validated, and connected.
Circumstances (money, time, location, kids) make it difficult for you to attend in-person marriage therapy or workshops.
Many couples who come for my intensive marriage therapy retreats express regret that there was not something available to help them earlier. Either they couldn’t afford traditional therapy, or there was no way for one or both of them to get away for an appointment each week.
That is the number one reason I created the online format.
With the Anatomy of Connection online workshop, you can work at your own pace and on your own schedule.
It is also SIGNIFICANTLY cheaper than therapy.*
YOU are motivated and willing to work on your relationship.
Even if your partner is not interested at this point, that is okay.
It’s common for me to hear men dismiss the idea of a workshop or therapy. It doesn’t mean they aren’t interested in the relationship. It just means they don’t want to sign up to get blamed for everything. No one wants to do that.
One woman reported she would watch the videos and do the exercises, and then she and her husband would discuss them in the evening. Pretty soon he realized it wasn’t as bad as he feared, and he was willing to go through the program with her.
It is always better to do the program together. But the information will improve your relationship, even if only one of you is doing it.
Why This Decision is an Easy Choice
Maybe you are concerned that it is still a significant investment and wondering if it is worth it.
One of the saddest things I hear as a marriage therapist is "If only we had learned how to stay connected years ago." This is your life! Your marriage! Your family! There is nothing more valuable! Investing in your marriage is the single greatest investment you could make in this life! Strong marriages are correlated with better health, better financial success, greater happiness, and greater peace.
PLEASE don't put off taking care of your marriage. You deserve a strong, happy relationship.
You Can't Afford NOT to Do This!
- The cost to repair a marriage is significantly higher than it is to prevent distress in the first place. (And that’s saying nothing about the emotional cost of loneliness, disconnection, and heartache.)
- If you were to pay to meet with me for one-on-one therapy for the same amount of time, it would cost you almost 8x the price of this program--plus travel expenses.
- Consider the financial cost to divorce. The number one cause of divorce is disconnection. Are you as emotionally connected as you want to be? Do you want to take that risk?
Frequently Asked Questions
Q: How much time will this course take?
A: I would plan ten to twelve hours to complete the course. There are just over 8 hours of video content. The workbook exercises, assessments, and bonuses will add additional time. Remember, the beauty of this format is you don't have to do it all at once. I know time is precious. That's why I have focused the content on only what you need to be successful. No fluff. Because you have access for a year, you can take your time going through the program and come back to anything as often as you like during that time.
Q: Why should I do this now?
A: Because waiting is wasting your life and you don’t want to do that. One of the most common things I hear from my clients is “I wish we did this 10 years ago, 20 years ago.” Waiting to find joy, waiting to find connection, waiting to feel safe and secure and loved is a sad existence. One that eventually brings a lot of regret. Refuse to be one of those statistics! You deserve to feel loved, secure, confident, and connected.
Q: Does this replace therapy?
A: This is an important question. No! This does not replace therapy. In fact, if you are in crisis, struggling to overcome an affair or manage an addiction, this will not be sufficient. That doesn’t mean the information won’t be helpful. But it does mean that taken by itself it will be insufficient to create the relationship you are longing for. Therapy does help though! I have helped many couples overcome these extremely painful situations. If you are struggling with high distress, intensive marriage therapy is a better option. If you are in an abusive relationship, the principles in this program could actually be harmful. I strongly encourage you to meet with a local Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist instead.
Q: How does this course compare to an in-person marriage workshop?
A: The first thing is that you can attend this course in your pajamas! You don’t have to travel, find a babysitter, pay for a hotel, or take time off work! This course is patterned after my live Anatomy of Connection workshops. The main difference is that you don’t have the dynamic of the group setting.
Q: What happens after I enroll?
A: You will receive an email from me with your login information and instructions for how to get started. Just follow the links to get into the course.
Q: Will I receive anything in the mail?
A: No. This is a 100% digital product which means you will have access to everything right away.
Q: Do I have to wait for content to be added?
A: Nope! All of the content for the course is available to you the moment you purchase it.
Q: How long do I have access to it?
A: You have access to the complete course for one year. That means if I add any additional content or update any of the videos within that year, you will be able to access those as well. This is one of the advantages over the live workshop. You can review the material as many times as you want.
Q: What if I don’t have time for this?
A: What you really don’t have time for is something that doesn’t work! You also don’t have time for marriage distress or divorce. If you want to improve your overall productivity, health, and happiness, working on your relationship is the best time investment you could make. I have boiled the content down to what matters most so you don’t have to sift through all the information out there to find what really works. I’ve also put them in small, easy to digest lessons so you can watch them even if you don’t have a large block of time. You have time for this.
Q: What if we try it and don’t feel the course is worth it to us?
A: No problem. I’m often afraid to buy something and have it not be worth it in the end. I don't want you to worry about that. This is why I offer a 30-day 100% money-back guarantee. If you go through the program—watch the videos and do the exercises—and don’t feel like you got out of it what I promised, I am more than happy to refund your purchase. Just shoot me an email within thirty days of purchase and a member of my team will take care of that.
If you are still wondering what to do, ask yourself these two questions . . .
Question #1
What would you tell a friend to do? If you had a friend come to you and express her desire to build a strong marriage and she felt this program would help her do that, but she still wasn’t sure if she should try it, what would you encourage her to do?
Question #2
If you move forward and enroll in this course, how are you going to feel in 10 minutes? What about 10 months? What about 10 years? (I know that sounds like three questions, but I call it the 10/10/10 question, so we’ll count it as one.)
In 10 minutes, you’ll still have a money back guarantee :). In 10 months, you could have a significantly stronger relationship. Imagine what that could look like in 10 years if you start today!!
Your relationship is the most important thing in your life! Do whatever you can to build and protect it. You’ll never regret the effort you make to grow closer together. But I can 100% guarantee you’ll experience regret if you get to the end of your relationship and wish you would have done more.
You Have the Power to Dramatically Improve and Protect Your Marriage
*Disclaimer: Bonuses and promotional pricing subject to change
Your investment is 100% risk free. Here's how it works: You have a full 30 days to try "The Anatomy of Connection Online Workshop." If you don't find this program helpful and worth every penny, just let me know and I will promptly issue a full refund...no questions asked. Essentially, you get value from the course, or you get your money back.
*This program is a relationship education course, not therapy.